A guy is walking towards me, accompanied by a woman, he's really looking at me, got that Manc Billy Big Balls wide-armed stupid swagger on. I avoid him and start crossing over Grafton St. He's saying something but I can't hear the words. I try to ignore him, but he carries on. Now I can hear him.
“Bit shady that ‘innit mate?”
I ignore him, he gets louder,
“I say, bit shady that isn't it mate?”
“What's that?” I reply,
“Bit shady that eh?”,
he gestures to my sunglasses,
“Ooh right, yeah, sunglasses, a bit shady, oh right. I see what you did there, yeah". Think you need to get some new jokes mate" I say,
“You need to get some new pants mate”, he replies. “Cheeky twat mate”, I think, then
I carry on across Grafton St, still trying to ignore him but I can’t resist,
“You need to get a new brain mate" I say,
now almost across the road. He's gesturing towards his ears,
“I said, you need to get a new brain mate".
He responds but is, thankfully, indecipherable and tbh, I've already lost interest, apart, that is from looking at my pants more often than usual . . .
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